Thursday, May 8, 2008

HALLOWEEN 2007: 3.0 out of 5 stars

Sid's take on the 2007 Halloween: It insists upon itself. January 30, 2008

This week we, Sid the Elf, decided to review the remake or whatever of the greatest horror film ever, Halloween. Now, we knew that this film was done by the ever-creepy Rob Zombie so we realized going in that things had a chance to get weird or stupid but this one was ridiculous. It was a remake of the classic, kind of but not really. And the parts that were the same as the original were different here. Sounds confusing? Well how about watching this in an altered state trying to figure it out?

The bulk of the film concentrated on Michael Myers's early life and his rise to the top of the world of serial killing. The funniest parts of this movie came in the section where the evil stepdad was making fun of a young Myers calling him a freak and questioning his sexuality while Myers stands there taking it while wearing a homemade mask. It doesn't get much funnier than that. You also had young Myers making the "I want to wrestle you so freaking bad" face whenever anyone made him mad. Well, when he wasn't wearing one of his little masks. That was great. Also, young Myers offered us a couple of freakouts. The one when he went off on Loomis was awesome. If this movie was not a remake of a classic, and stood on its own, it would have made a pretty good horror B as all the elements were there. However, when you look at this film as the remake that it was, it fell way short.

First, Sid would like to talk to you about Loomis. In the original, he was the best part about the film. Who could forget such classic lines as, "Tell your men to keep their eyes open and their mouths closed," along with many others. In the remake Loomis offered nothing, he had the blackest eyes, the devil's eyes. He even exploited Myers's psychosis by writing a book and going on a speaking tour over it. Then, there was Laurie. In the first film, she was sweet and innocent and you really did not want Myers to catch her. This was one of the things that made the original. In the new version, she was trashy and annoying. Sid was hoping they would change the ending and have Myers strangle her by the 30 minute mark. Finally, there was Myers. In this one, he was a giant goon, which does explain his freakish strength and adds a lot in the way of unintentional comedy. But, he was so goofy. Sid even joked that Kane was playing him, only to find out that it was actually a more b wrestler that we'd never even heard of! Big Sky is the guy's name for the record.

So, this film was ok at best. That's factoring in all the unintentional comedy by goofy Myers, young Myers, and the stepdad; and the um, comedic mood Sid was in. Appearances by Clint Howard and Danny Trejo helped ease the pain a little. Oh, and the few times the film featured "Don't Fear the Reaper" was a pretty cool nod to the original and to more cowbell. But, Zombie's version concentrated too much on the gore of Myers' killings and his disturbed past really trying to drive home the fact that this man is totally insane. Yeah, we kind of got that by the huge killing spree, but I guess when you're Rob Zombie that's not really enough to classify someone as off the reservation. This one is probably only worth checking out if you've never seen the original and want to settle in with a decent horror B or if you just want to make fun of fat young Myers for a little bit. All in all 3 stars, not great, not bad. It insists upon itself, I like The Money Pit.
Click here for movie trailer:

No comments: