Thursday, May 1, 2008

THE DEATA FORCE: 3.0 out of 5 stars

The only way Chuck gets only 3 stars is when he's weighed down by a mutant mullet and Lee Marvin's eyebrows, September 10, 2007

How is it possible that a movie as promising as Delta Force gets only three stars from Sid the Elf? All the elements were there. On the cover, you have the stars of the show(Chuck Norris and Lee Marvin with special appearances by Chuck's uber-mullet and Lee's eyebrows that looked like wings in case his head decided to fly away) holding bazookas, undoubtedly poised to blow some terrorists to bits. Unfortunately, that's about as good as it got. The plot followed no logic and we, Sid the Elf, have no respect for those who have no respect for logic. The first explosions after the opening credits happened about an hour into the film. If it's Sid, he says that move doesn't have it. Nobody is watching a movie staring Chuck Norris and Lee Marvin to see an enthralling plot and good acting. We want to see 128 minutes of non-stop explosions, cool guns, people being thrown off stuff, neck-snappings, and roundhouse kicks out the thing. It's a real easy formula. Whoever made Delta Force 2 had the recipe. Delta Force was just lacking. It pains us, Sid the Elf-because we love Chuck and think he's as much of a one man wrecking crew as the next reviewer-to say NO DEAL to Delta Force.
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